I sought a second opinion today about my condition. Let's just say that it's been overwhelming. But today, I don't want to focus on that. Instead, I'd like to reflect on what I learned from a dear brother on Sunday morning.
Brother Peng Kit's sharing on Sunday provided me with much-needed encouragement as he expounded on 2 Kings 6. To summarize the context of this chapter, the King of Aram had surrounded the city where Elisha was in hopes of capturing him. Naturally, Elisha's servant was terrified that the enemy's army was ready to strike, exclaiming, "what shall we do?"
And this was Elisha's reply (reading from 2 Kings 6:16-17):
16 “Don’t be afraid,” the prophet answered. “Those who are with us are more than those who are with them.”
17 And Elisha prayed, “Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see.” Then the Lord opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.
These few sentences touched me:
"Don't be afraid"
"Those who are with us are more than those who are with them"
"Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see"
More often than not, my journey with Moyamoya feels like a really lonely one. Few people understand the pain and the struggle this disease brings. To some, like me, it's an invisible disorder. I look healthy from the outside, but my brain and functioning is in chaos.
Verses 16 and 17 was a gentle reminder that I do not need to fear as God is on my side and is in control of this battle. He is watching over me and his angels are surrounding me.
Brother Peng Kit called on us to pray for God to open our eyes that we can see what He is doing in our lives. Sometimes, we can't see His work or we are clueless to what His will is for us. Sometimes, I don't know what this personal struggle is for. I don't know what I am to learn from this. I need to earnestly pray that God will reveal to me what He is doing and to help me reject the devious lies of the devil that I am suffering alone.
As I was meditating upon these verses, a hymn that I love to sing came to me. Upon reading the lyrics of this hymn, I found it so appropriate for it to be my prayer to God - not only to open my eyes to see His work in me, but for my ears to be open to His Truths, my mouth to openly share about His love for me, and my mind to be open to His Word, so that I am walking the right path with Him and continue to be a good testimony for Him.
After going through youtube, I found this slow rendition of the hymn, and the girl sings it so beautifully. Unfortunately, she does not sing all 4 verses of the hymn. But I still love it.
Open my eyes that I may see
Glimpses of truth Thou hast for me;
Place in my hands the wonderful key
That shall unclasp and set me free.
Glimpses of truth Thou hast for me;
Place in my hands the wonderful key
That shall unclasp and set me free.
Chorus:
Silently now I wait for Thee,
Ready, my God, Thy will to see;
Open my eyes, illumine me,
Spirit Divine!
Ready, my God, Thy will to see;
Open my eyes, illumine me,
Spirit Divine!
Open my ears that I may hear
Voices of truth Thou sendest clear;
And while Your whispers fall on my ear,
Everything false will disappear.
Voices of truth Thou sendest clear;
And while Your whispers fall on my ear,
Everything false will disappear.
Open my mouth and let me bear
Tidings of mercy everywhere;
Open my heart and let me prepare
Love with Thy children thus to share.
Tidings of mercy everywhere;
Open my heart and let me prepare
Love with Thy children thus to share.
Open my mind that I may read
More of Thy love in word and deed;
What shall I fear while yet Thou dost lead?
Only for light from Thee I plead.
More of Thy love in word and deed;
What shall I fear while yet Thou dost lead?
Only for light from Thee I plead.
Open my eyes, Lord... Teach me to be ready to see Your Will...