Anger

 Of late, I realize I've been more and more irritable and angry. I'm feeling a lot of frustration and it's pretty pent up. In the past I used to go a few rounds on my punching bag for catharsis but with my muscle recovery already being rather slow I do not want to make it worse.

I am WELL aware what's upsetting me, and I know that part of my frustration is my sense of helplessness. I look around and I see incompetence and stubbornness that is damaging. Not just in the political scene but even at home. I feel dismissed and invisible at home, while also being expected to do more while the others just laze and expected to be treated like kings. I feel the need to fight or escape nearly everyday but feel trapped. 

I realize that I tend to weigh options and will make decisions based on whats best for my surroundings but one thing I realize is that many are not as thoughtful. There is so much selfishness around me that it really irks me. 

I'm exasperated. It's come to a point where there is really no love lost. 

I desperately want to dig a hole to hide and recuperate or just disappear for a while just to give space for myself.